Sucky life of a macho man

You fuckers think YOUR lives suck?

Be me

Be 11, realise I am a faggot

Fuck

Live in a backwards-ass tiny redneck Eurofag town, would get kicked out if anyone found out

Pull up this ridiculous macho-persona, get really into sports and hunting and shit

Turns out my hunting buddy is gay too

Forbiddenlove.jpg

Be 25, tall and into sports, so bitches go after me left and right

Have to find an excuse to turn all of them down

Find this nerdy freak bitch who hates me

Start hitting on her really badly, she obviously turns me down

my beard hates me, idgaf

Then the bitch suddenly isn't around anymore

Turns out she's gotten this crazy-ass abusive boyfriend who won't let her leave the house

The cops can't do shit, everyone looks at me like I'm supposed to do something about it

Gotta pull the macho face, get some friends, including my hunting buddy, and walk up to the boyfriend's house

The bitch pulls some stockholm syndrome loony shit about how we don't understand their love

The boyfriend is fucking insane

Things get heated and I end up stabbing the boyfriend, who shoves me off the building

The love of my life watches as I fall to my death

mfw nobody's still slick as Gaston