Sonic.exe THE REAMEKE 2020

"Sonic is such a cool Hedgehog! Until I played this..." - Bob 2019 That's me by the way. I'm Bob. I had the misfortune to play this game because I'm a Sonic fan. I f**king hate my life.

I would like to present to you. SONIC.EXE THE REAMEKE 2020!

hahahahahahahahahah...ugh (My name isn't Bob, by the way)

 Chapter 1 

Man, sonic movie trailer 2 is so good. I decided to beg my mom to buy a another sonic games because im a gamer.

My mommy took me to the game store and stumble upon the box of forgotten games for sale. I was suprised by that box because it's cheap. I look at the box and saw a SONIC GAME!

It's called "sonic.exe totally kids friendly". Wierd ass name but ok.

So i buy it becuz it's cheap anddddd...... It was a mistake.

 Chapter 2  So I pop the game thing and turned on genesisssss. Expecting title screen but greeted with the black screen saying : "Thanks for buying our games. Before playing this, pls watch sonic movie first trailer for 1 hours to proceed. THX, from Sega."

Already and I'm PISSED OFF. WHY THE FIRST TRAILER???

IT'S SO BADDDDDD! *passed out*

After 1 hour of torture, I finally get to play tha gamee.

"Took you long enough." I said.

So i got to the title screen and it's sonic 1 title screen. "Yay, I finally get to the games", i happily said.

But then, the screen flash with this scary picture Oh no...

This picture...

IT GAVE ME VN FLASHBACK OF THE SH*TTY SONIC MOVIE TRAILER AND I DONT LIKE IT.

then i ignored it and continued.

 CHAPTER 3 

So I get to the character select screen, consisted with: Tails, Knock Knock Knuckles and sonic OC. oh, and eggmen don't forget.

I picked tails and it begin. I walk through greeen hills and see lots of dead animals. OMG, so scary! (sarcasm)

Again, i see much worse so i don't really care about dead animals. (don't kill me, Peta.)

Then I SAW SONIC-KUN. He doesn't feel so good. He saw me and said: "Wanna play hide and seek, tails?"

I picked sure becuz i played with my dog all the time. THEN... Sonic just killed tails.

I

AM

HEARTBROKEN

* sad face*

 CHAPTER THREE & KNUCKLES

So I get to knuckles stage and i get to punch sonic.exe in punch out style. Only one problem, I don't know how to played punch out so...as expected, i got my ass whooped by THAT DEMON.

I wished i played more punch out, so knuckles could survived. and yes,

sonic

just subzero'ed

knuckles,...

after I took this screenshot of me proudly show my punchout skills.

 CHAPTER 4 EVER 

I couldn't able to played sonic OC, so i skipped to eggmen or eggman idk. His stage is the hardest because of the stair. MY WORST NIGHTMARE! or maybe becuz he's too fast to climbed them... idk. Again, didn't he able to outrun sonic in Sonic 2 before... whatever.

So yeah, like everbody else... He died before even climb to last stair. Wanna knows how he died? Sonic kicked him. He fell 50 ft before dying.

Poor guy...

'''FINAL CHAPTER! FINALLY!'''

The screen turn to static for 10 secs and back to black screen. It said: "Do you enjoy this game?" then i said no, then the game said: "Do you wanna have a bad time?" then i said no, then the game said: "I'M GOD!!!"

Then my tv screens exploded!

"You can not run, Bob!" some voices.

"HOW DO YOU KNOW MY NAMES?" I said. That question doesn't matter but, what really matters is... The past movie sonic is BACK!

HE IS UGLIER THAN BEFORE..., not that much but still...RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!

I tried run as fast as possible but no matter what, I couldn't do it...

BUT THEN Deus Ex Machina CAME IN TIME.

IT'S A BOX OF GRENADE!

I threw them all at Sonic but he catches them all. He then threw them at me. As genius I was, I duck them all.

Stupid me... The police then arrived!

"WHO BURNED DOWN THE HOUSE" one of the cops said.

"IT WAS SONIC!" as i was pointing at him...wait. He's gone!

"So, it was you!" the cops responded

"NO! IT WAS ME!"

and then I'm in jails for thirty years.

"Why are you doing this to me?" me while crying at jails cell.

"Because we're cops. And life is a f**king nightmare. In all seriousness, you got in jails because you burn down someone house"

"My house..."

"Whatever, have fun in jails!"

The cops walked away.

As I sadly stay in jails, that voices came: "You shouldn't have bought my game!"

It was none another than sonic voices, mocking me.

"I hate you!" I responded.

Morals: Buy a legit copy of the game, don't waste money buying a bootleg because that's no good!