Why the Pringles guy is actually satan

used to love eating Pringles, but not anymore after I learned the secret of the monsterous guy on the tin of every can of Pringles you eat. He is SATAN! Don't believe me? Here's the truth:

His moustache is a weapon. He can detatch it and throw it at his own will. Anyone that even breathes on his moustache turns to dust. His bowtie is not cool, unlike The doctor's bowtie. Upon seeing his bowtie, you will become permanently depressed. He actually supports Garfield, who actually ATE NERMAL AT ONE POINT!

The pringles that you eat are actually the SOULS OF THE PEOPLE THAT HE'S KILLED! He kills them either by throwing his moustache as his victims, or by burning them with his flame breath. Then he steals the souls into curved discs, which are the pringles you may be eating right now. Worse, he might actually make CHOCOLATE PRINGLES at one point! His hairdo is actually a portal, where touching it tekeports you in the deepest pits of the underworld.

The name "Pringles" is actually an acronym for "Pathetic Rats, I now give levelled evil somber!". Yoshi actually challenged him at Mario Kart, and Yoshi won! This banished the Pringles guy to the underworld, where he can't cause as much terror.

Pringles guy is hate, Pringles guy is death.