JEFF THE KILLER LEARNS THE MEANING OF CHRISTMAS

it was december 24th in hollis ave in the dark jeff the killer was dressed as santa claus his costume was wite but it got stained red from all the blood he had a big sack he put it down and out spilled a buncha eyeballs that look like christmas ornamints hehehe he said some kiddies are going to get a real suprEYES on christmas day

jef brok into a mansion he poured the eyeballs on the christmas tree and snucked up the stares like some sort of grinch he went to my parents room and said ho ho ho i know who is naughty wake up so you can go to sleep so murder claus can come and murder you

my dad tried to grab his machine gun but he didnt have it becuz of f*kin obama jeff through a knife at him and it got stuck in his brain. my dad is screaming ah ah ah ah my brain and then he died my mom is just crying like a dumb hore who dont understand nothing jeff punches her in the mouth then sticks a bunch of needles in her face

its the season of giving jeff said and im giving you a buncha needles in you face

then he bicycle kicked the needles into her face and they severed a bunch of arteries and she exploded into blood

my sister ran into my parents room her dumb t*tt*es all over the place and jeff says what do you want for christmas

and my sister says i dont want to die

and jeff says well elves dont make that its kind of just a concept not really a physical thing that i can give you i can give you this ax though and he holds up a can of ax chocolate dragon body spray and sprays it and holds a lighter in front of it and my sister catches on fire. she ranned around screaming and then jumped out of a window

when jeff came into my room i was ready for him i had on my juggalo makeup and he thought he was looking into a mirror it was p funny but also scary and weird we heard and sound and ran down to the christmas tree jeff screams because he forgot about the eyeballs on the tree but i just laugh and am brave

we saw santa coming down the chimney and jeff is like theres only one room for santas in this town and ran santa through with my authentic katana sword i bot from that chinese place at the mall with the incense and posters

i think for a second WAIT JEFF SOMETHING IS WRONG i shout and run to santas corpse i take of santas glasses and windbreaker

it wasnt santa

it was jesus

no i shout why why why

and jeff jusrt laughs and says who cares about this guy

and i said its not a guy its the sun of god

and jeff says who and i cry a single tear because jeffs soul is in danger

jesus christ hes like king of christmas i say hear let me show you i rub my hands on jesus and rub my hands on myself to get jesus magic on me then i took jefs hand no homo and we flew out the window and into the sky

jesus was born on christmas day in 0 ad brian tell jeff then later he got crucified on the cross

why would he do that asks jeff because when he died he was like kirby and sucked up all r sins even future sins and hes like look im dying hear and if you love me like i love you then when you die youll go to heaven

thats pretty cool jeff said

we flew threw a cloud

jesus loves us and only threw him can we get everlasting life in heaven jeff starts crying

i cant belief i killed such an awesome dude then jesus pops up and he says you didnt kill me that was a test to see if you r truly worethy of the kingdom of heaven oh and hears your christmas present he gives jeff and brain boxes and they open them

oh man the new pokemon game i say then i look closer what POKEMON BLACK?!?!?!

Written by ImGonnaBeThatGuy in this blog post comment.