Sonic.sht

I am still not sure what happened that day.. Perhaps, I have gone temporarily mad, and imagined the whole thing, but then, signs still remain that it was all real..

It was a fine Spring day, when one of my good friends, who, by the way, was a major games and anime nerd, handed me a CD-ROM Disk.. "Play it," he said, "You will not be disappointed." I said my thanks, and put the disk aside, as I had some things I had to get done... I did not pay attention to the writing on it, though, on second thought, maybe I should have..

Few days later, Saturday morning came, and I decided that I would like to be a useless piece of shit, and stay at home the whole day, playing video games. I thought back to my friend, and decided to play his disk. I dusted off my Sega CD and took the disk out of my drawer. Looking at it, it looked just like a standard CD-R, with writing in black Sharpie marker, "Sonic.Sht." Oh, so it was a Sonic game that my friend wanted me to play! I myself was not a big video game person, until my good game nerd friend came along, hell, I barely even played Sonic before, and so, decided to educate myself on this historic video game. I popped CD into the Sega CD, and prepared to indulge myself in the glory that is Sonic.

So.. First thing that popped up was that famous title screen, where Sonic is wagging his finger at you.. It looked just like a standard one, no surprises there... And then.. My phone rang. Shit! I went off to answer it, and while I was at it, got myself some brownies from my fridge, as a snack. My video game friend was the one calling me, and asked me how his game was. I said that I just popped that sucker in, and was preparing to indulge in some Sonic. He laughed, and wished me luck. We bullshitted around for about twenty minutes, and then he hung up. I grabbed a tray of brownies and got back to my TV and Sonic. Along the way, I should mention, I ate a few of those brownies. They were delicious!

But.. What greeted me when I came back, was not the Sonic game that we all know and love! The background got darker, it became almost dark brown color with black streaks every which way! Sonic himself was still wagging his finger, but his eyes turned red, and his expression changed from his signature smile to that of pain and internal suffering.. He looked absolutely terrified! And the more I looked, the more pained his expression became. Finally, instead of Start, a word "Please" started to flash on the screen. Sonic kept wagging his finger, but looked at me, and I swear, I could see his eyes pleading with me! His eyes started to bulge out of his head.. As if I was possessed, I pressed the Start button on my controller, and then the screen went black..

When it came back, I saw Sonic standing in front of a long hallway.. Eggman was there too, laughing, and pointing toward the end of it.. And then Sonic started to run! He ran, and ran, and ran, but the hallway kept on going. Eggman was following him, laughing maniacally, as Sonic kept on running. I could see tears of blood streaming down Sonic's face, his eyes were blood red, and soon, as he kept running, his hands moved closer and closer to his lower half of the body.. The animation kept looping, as I stood transfixed as Sonic, clutching at his lower half, ran, and ran, and ran! For what seemed like eternity, he kept on going, looking as if he was going through unfathomable torture with each step! There was complete silence, but, every once in a while, a weird sound, like that of a tinny thunderclap, could be heard.

But, lo! soon the screen changed again. Sonic was in, what looked like, a restroom, with a shower and a toilet. And then Sonic let out an ear piercing scream, and as if his life depended on it, crashed down upon that toilet. And then Sonic took a shit. Sound of tinny thunderclaps filled my TV speakers. For what seemed like eternity, Sonic kept on shitting. At times, you could see him rising up from the toilet seat, almost like a rocket, and then a weird brown substance looked to be coming out of Sonic's bottom. As he shat, expression of relief started to spread accross his face, even as brown substance started to leak out of the toilet and onto the ground. The thunderclaps started to subside, and then, as the room was becoming more and more filled with brown substance, the screen went black again.

When it came back, Sonic was on the brown floor of the restroom, crying. He looked defeated and dejected, but at the same time, I could see that he was also relieved and that those tears, were partially due to the fact that his ordeal was over.. But then.. He looked up, and it seemed to me, that he looked straight into my eyes. I suddenly felt ill, and horrid stench filled my nostrils. It was so unbearable, that I passed out..

When I came to, I was standing in a long hallway in my apartment. I felt slight, but consistently building pressure in the lower half of my body. Sonic was standing in front of me, with anger in his eyes. "Why did you not press Start?" He quietly hissed.. "I am sorry," I stammered, though I knew that sorry would not cut it... "I have suffered horribly," Sonic continued, "And it was all your fault.. So.. You shall feel what I felt! An eye for an eye and a shit for a shit! Now... Run!!!" He commanded in a booming voice, and then, suddenly, I realized that if I do not run, I might just shit myself.. I did not wish to shit myself in front of Sonic, that would be embarrassing, and so, I started to run toward the restroom. But, oh cruel fate!, the hallway kept on going and going! It kept on extending with each step! As pressure in my bottom half built, I kept on running, clutching at my asshole, in a futile effort to keep waves of wanting to shit under control. Sonic followed me... It seemed like an eternity has passed, and I was sweating.. I could feel my eyes bulging out of my head.. But, salvation! There was my restroom! With a howl, not unlike that of wolf that really wanted to take a dump, I crashed down upon my toilet! Sonic kept looking on with satisfied smile on his face. Through my tears of relief, I could see him wagging his finger at me.. Waves of bowel movements kept on going and going through me, and I could feel that giant pile of shit I was making going higher and higher. With one final mighty effort, it was over.. I collapsed from my throne exhausted and relieved. Sonic smiled in a satisfied manner, and snapped his fingers together. All went black....

When I came to again, I was sitting on my couch, with a Sonic game on my TV screen. It was the Sonic game we are all used to.. I could hear laughter all around me. A bunch of my friends were there, all of them collapsing from mirth. My friend explained, through peals of merriment, that he had spiked my brownies with a laxative, and, well, since, let's be honest here, those were some "special" brownies, they all had the pleasure of watching me running in my mindless state, between bathroom and the couch, pick up the controller, try to play Sonic, but then run to the bathroom once more, over and over!

I beat the shit out of my asshole friend, kicked everyone out of the house, and moved to a different state. But, as I was moving into my new home, a CD fell out of a box I was unpacking.. It was a typical CD-R disk, with writing on it, "Sonic.sht".