User blog:NedWolfkin/Ned's Nitpicks Volume 8: The Pacman Game Console

'''Look at the picture on the left. It is an old Pacman Gaming Console Machine!'''

No, it's not a console. A gaming console is something you hook up to your television. I think you mean to say "Arcade cabinet".

It's said to be the first virtual game created by NAMCO.

WTF, it's not a virtual game! And it's not even NAMCO's first game, either!

Today, I'll tell you a story that happened way back 90's.

I'll tell you what happened back in the 90's. Movies were good, Cartoon Network, The Disney Channel, and Nickelodeon didn't suck, and pogs and Pokemon cards were king.

A mother have a child.

Thus what makes her a mother.

'''This child is now 3-years old. This mother bought a new "Pacman Game Console". She searched the internet to find any one at an affordable price.'''

I'm not even going to point out the fact that Pac-Man was released for every console, or the fact that it's unlikely anyone would do that when the internet was steaming new at that time.

He checked the internet daily to see if there are new ones.

Not only is that a massive tense swap, but also "he"? I thought it was the mother looking.

'''After searching a lot of sites, finally he saw 1 at very affordable price. The original price is almost 2-3000 dollars. But this one is $1000 only!'''

Yeah, to Hell with Nintendo if they think I'm going to buy their $99 console that I can play more than one game on, and an additional $75 for the game itself!

'''He contact the seller and ask for pictures of the console and to ask if the console is still available. The seller replies back and said that the console is still available. All buttons and slot is working. But no available pictures.'''

That's because in those days photo transfer was both a pain in the ass, and expensive!

He called the seller and contact him.

And they talk so he can ask him.

'''They planned to meet at a well-known coffee shop. After that day, they went to see each other.'''

The day after they planned, or the day after they met?

The mother hired a delivery service so that the machine would be delivered to their house.

And she breathed air so she could breath, and she plugged the game in so they could play, and made food so they can eat. Christ, the rudandancy!

'''After placing it to their basement, they played the game. The console seemed to be new. There's no any scratch mark.'''

Too bad there isn't no any language poorly.

'''The buttons are still hard and not loose. She inspected the whole console and found out that it's Ms. Pacman.'''

JESUS, DUDE! You've been playing this game and suddenly realize "Oh wait, this is Ms. Pacman." Why the fuck did it take this broad so long? Why did the author suddenly decide to change it?

'''Also, there are 5 ghost instead of 4. They played the game several hours. It's now evening. So they decided to go to sleep. The mother unplugged the game. They locked the basement, ate their dinner and go to bed.'''

They were so wrapped up in the game that they forgot to eat before going to sleep, apparently. Christ this family is stupid! How can someone who has the brain of a flea afford a $1000 fucking arcade cabinet?!

'''In the middle of the night, some strange noise appeared! Someone or something shut a door. This mother went down with a fire arm on her back. He went down and check the front door and the back door. Nothing's wrong with them. The alarm systems are still quiet. No signs of theft. But, again, she heard some noises. She followed that noise until she got to the basement. She checked the door quietly. The doors are shut lock. She peeped onto the peeping hole. She was so creeped to see that the video game was playing on it's own!'''

I laughed.

'''She still remembered that she unplugged it before eating. She opened the door. She had some really really strange feeling. She turned of the machine and unplug it. She locked the door and sleep again. At around 3:00 AM, she heard it again! Now, she heard it really really clear. It was the sound of the video game. She went downstairs and turn it off. She locked it again and went to sleep. She called many game technicians to fix the game. But they saw no errors.'''

Sounds like she should see psychologist instead of wasting a "game technician's" time.

'''This happens for several days. The mother was just thinking that it's here son going out in the middle of the night to have some fun. Or sometimes, she thinks: "Well, they're dreams."'''

God this bitch is stupid!

'''Until 1 day. This mother and her children were eating their breakfast. Her middle child started the conversation. "Mom. The video game sound in the middle of the night!" Everyone laughed except for the mother who smiled at him.'''

Great, the kid's going to be a dumbass like his mom!

One night, the mother went out of the office late.

I hope it was a psychologist's office.

'''She went immediately to the house and she was surprised to see that his 2 children was outside. Th boys quickly drag their mothers hand and pull her inside the house. She saw her 3-year old son, crying beside the gaming machine. The boy says: "Man in the Video Machine!!!"'''

Jesus Christ, this kid's gonna be shitting his pants until high school!

The other kids tell their mom that they saw a black man playing on the Pacman Gaming Console.

WOAH, RACIST! A black man? What we're not allowed to play Pac-Man too? Fucking racist assed little bastard.

This mother immediately called a "Mover Team" to remove that old gaming console.

I'm going to assume that this is taking place in 1990. If that is the case, the console would only be at least ten years old.

The console has been moved to her business garage (2 miles away ffrom them).

Read: moved to the asylum basement.

'''Fortunately, nothing creepy appeared on those days. Sometimes, this mother went to see her business garage and she is always surprised to see that the tools have been scattered. Now, this woman is selling this video game for free.'''

Now? As in now now? This is supposed to take place in the 1990s, why did it take her about twenty years to get off her ass? Dumb bitch!