Greg is Dead

I bought a Diary of a Wimpy Kid book for free from a garage sale. It was scary!!!!! It said Greg is Dead and had a picture of Greg DEAD. He was bleeding REAL blood ! I was so scared that I called a nuke to come blow up my house. An evil Greg came out of the book holding a knife. I ran down to my living room and hid under a table. The evil Greg was looking for me. The nuke hit my house and I watched my family and the evil Greg get obliterated by the blast. I was blasted away in a fiery cloud. I survived. I walked by the bodies of my family. My sister was next to her Zizzle-branded SpongeBob Squarepants handheld, my brother was next to his Pokemon cards, and my parents were next to a melted coffee pot. I found the body of the evil Greg next to the remains of that book. My city has been completely destroyed and the radiation is starting to fall. I will not survive long. If you're reading this, STOP READING DIARY OF A WIMPY KID. It's for your own good.